Funny Halloween Quotes And Sayings With Pictures

Are you looking for halloween quotes funny? then you are at the right place. We have come up with a handpicked collection of funny halloween quotes, funny halloween quotes sayings and Don’t forget to read Halloween Quotes images, Happy Halloween Quotes and Sayings

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I see my face in the mirror and go, 'I'm a Halloween costume? That's what they think of me?Drew Carey

I just asked my husband if he remembers what today is. Scaring men is easy.Donna Macabre

Instead of buying a Halloween costume it was cheaper just to get a haircut at Great Clips.Northside Hombre

Got home, opened the bedroom closet door and a naked guy shrieked at me. Wow, my wife has some pretty crazy Halloween pranks up her sleeve.Brian Hope

A Fargo woman will give overweight trick-or-treaters warning letters, not candy. In other news, a woman's house will be egged by fat kids.Julius Sharpe

Honey. I didn't *lose* our kid on Halloween, he just went as the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle and I can't know exactly where he is.Earthman Adam

Last Halloween was bad for me. I got beat up. I went to a party dressed as a piñata.Jim Samuels

I learned something the other day. I learned that Jehovah’s Witnesses do not celebrate Halloween. I guess they don’t like strangers going up to their door and annoying them.Bruce Clark

I love Halloween. It's the only night of the year I can wear a wedding dress without looking desperate.Adam

Hair stylist: Gonna wear a costume for Halloween? Me: (Looking at my new haircut in the mirror) Probably something with a hood.John Lyon

These masked trick-or-treaters must be confused. They're a day early, came in the back door, passed up the candy & took the big screen TV.Just Bill

This Halloween the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him.Conan O'Brien

Funny Halloween Quotes, Halloween is by far, the safest day to kill a person and leave them in a chair on your porch.

Halloween is by far, the safest day to kill a person and leave them in a chair on your porch.


Funny Halloween Quotes, Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He wasn't even the star of his own Halloween special. -Chris Rock

Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He wasn't even the star of his own Halloween special.Chris Rock

Funny Halloween Quotes, For Halloween you should go as the person you claim to be on Facebook. - Anonymous

For Halloween you should go as the person you claim to be on Facebook.Anonymous

Funny Halloween Quotes, Ghosts, like ladies, never speak till spoke to. -Richard Harris

like ladies, never speak till spoke to.Richard Harris

Funny Halloween Quotes, All my life my parents said, Never take candy from strangers, And then they dressed me up and said, Go beg for it, I didn't know what to do! I'd knock on people's doors and go, 'Trick or treat'No thank you. - Rita runder

All my life my parents said, Never take candy from strangers, And then they dressed me up and said, Go beg for it, I didn't know what to do! I'd knock on people's doors and go, 'Trick or treat'No thank you.Rita runder

Funny Halloween Quotes, Halloween was confusing. All my life my parents said, "Never take candy from strangers". And then they dressed me up and said, "Go beg for it". I didn't know what to do! I'd knock on people's doors and go, "Trick or treat". "No thank you". -Rita Rudner

Halloween was confusing. All my life my parents said, "Never take candy from strangers". And then they dressed me up and said, "Go beg for it". I didn't know what to do! I'd knock on people's doors and go, "Trick or treat". "No thank you".Rita Rudner

Funny Halloween Quotes, I put the costume on and said 'It's not very comfortable, but it looks amazing', so it's all good. - Chris Hemsworth

I put the costume on and said 'It's not very comfortable, but it looks amazing', so it's all good.Chris Hemsworth

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Funny Halloween Quotes, I would rather sit on a pumpkin and have it all to myself than be crowded on a velvet cushion. - Henry David Thoreau

I would rather sit on a pumpkin and have it all to myself than be crowded on a velvet cushion.Henry David Thorea

Funny Halloween Quotes, I'll bet living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween. -Charles Swartz

I'll bet living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween.Charles Swartz

Funny Halloween Quotes, It's Halloween and hopefully you people that partied last night didn't wake next to something scary this morning. - Anonymous

It's Halloween and hopefully you people that partied last night didn't wake next to something scary this morning.Anonymous

Funny Halloween Quotes, On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me.Rodney Dangerfield

Funny Halloween Quotes, The older you get, the harder it is to find someone willing to share a horse costume with you. - Anonymous

The older you get, the harder it is to find someone willing to share a horse costume with you.Anonymous

Funny Halloween Quotes, The werewolf is neither man nor wolf, but a satanic creature with the worst qualities of both. -Warner Oland

The werewolf is neither man nor wolf, but a satanic creature with the worst qualities of both.Warner Oland

Funny Halloween Quotes, There is nothing funny about Halloween. This sarcastic festival reflects, rather, an infernal demand for revenge by children on the adult world. -Jean Baudrillard

There is nothing funny about Halloween. This sarcastic festival reflects, rather, an infernal demand for revenge by children on the adult world.Jean Baudrillard

Funny Halloween Quotes, From ghoulies and ghosties and long leggety beasties and things that go bump in the night, Good Lord, deliver us! - Scottish Saying

From ghoulies and ghosties and long leggety beasties and things that go bump in the night, Good Lord, deliver us!Scottish Saying

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