40 Best Funny Love Quotes Of All Time

Browse our collection of Funny Quotes about Love, and humorous Funny Love quotes and Images.

Funny Quotes
Share the best funny love quotes collection by famous authors: Love is known as greatest strength as well as biggest weakness of a person. You can have a large number of definitions for love, but still you can?t define what the feeling is exactly. While there have been many quotations describing the essence of love, some of them have delved on its amusing side as well. In the following lines, we have compiled a collection of some of the most funny love quotes. Go through these humorous love sayings and have fun sharing it with you beloved as well as your friends. Don’t forget to read funny quotes about love

Love is sharing your popcorn.Charles Schultz

People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.Bob Hope

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights onJoan Rivers

If love is the answer, could you rephrase the questions?Lily Tomlin

Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.Billy Crystal

Love is a sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock.Jewish Proverb
In love, somehow, a man’s heart is always either exceeding the speed limit, or getting parked in the wrong place. ― Rowland
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.Groucho Marx

A kiss without a mustache is like an egg without salt.Spanish Proverb

I kissed my first girl and smoked my first cigarette on the same day. I haven’t had time for tobacco since.Arturo Toscanini

Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner.Jerry Seinfeld

Love doesn’t drop on you unexpectedly; you have to give off signals, sort of like an amateur radio operator.Helen Gurley Brown

Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning a handspring or eating with chopsticks; it looks easy until you try it.Helen Rowland

Just for the hell of it, try to love someone as unlike you as possible.William T Vollman

A kiss is a rosy dot over the “I” of loving. ― Cerano de Bergerac

Once you have loved someone, you'd do anything in the world for them... except love them again.Anonymous

Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.Jules Renard

Happiness is the china shop; love is the bull. - H. L. Mencken

The only true love is love at first sight; second sight dispels it.Israel Zangwill quotes

Love is like heaven, but it can hurt like hell. ― Unknown

I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. ― Rita Rudner

Many a young lady does not realize just how strong her love for a young man is until he fails to pass the approval test with her parents.― Unknown

Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.Woody Allen

I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it? ― Jean Illsley Clarke

Love is a grave mental disease.Plato

The only people who make love all the time are liars.Louis Jordan

I thought I was promiscuous, but it turns out I was just thorough. ― Russell Brand

Sometimes I find myself making love to my own misfortune.Norma O. Abrego

No matter how love-sick a woman is, she shouldn't take the first pill that comes along.Joyce Brothers

Love doesn’t make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile. ― Franklin P. Jones

Friendship often ends in love; but love in friendship--neverCharles Caleb Colto

Falling in love consists merely in uncorking the imagination and bottling the common sense.Helen Rowland

Love is a crocodile in the river of desire. - Bhartshari, Satakatraya, 5th century

Love teaches even asses to dance.French Proverb

Love your enemies. It really pisses them off!

Love is an ocean of emotion entirely surrounded by expenses. - Sir Thomas Robert Dewar

To infinite, ever present Love, all is Love, and there is no error, no sin sickness, nor death.Mary Baker Eddy

Friendship often ends in love; but love in friendship--neverCharles Caleb Colton

Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species. - W. Somerset Maugham


I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the time he killed himself.Johnny Carson

Love is the only disease that makes you feel better. - (attributed to Sam Shepard)

went to a meeting for premature ejaculators. I left early.Jack Benny

He gave her a look that you could have poured on a waffle.Ring Lardner

Romance is the icing, but love is the cake.

What the world really needs is more love and less paperwork.Pearl Bailey

If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?Lily Tomlin

The head never rules the heart, but just becomes its partner in crime. - Mignon McLaughlin

Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing.Natasha Leggero

I’m now making a Jewish porno film. 10 percent sex, 90 percent guilt.Henny Youngman

To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia. - H. L. Mencken

Marry a man your own age; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.Phyllis Diller

Don’t make love by the garden gate, love is blind but the neighbors ain’t.Anonymous

To fall in love is awfully simple, but to fall out of love is simply awful.

Marriage is like pantyhose. It all depends on what you put into it.Phyllis Schlafly

What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30 pounds.Cindy Garner

We'll love you just the way you are if you're perfect. -- Alanis Morissette

Hope you enjoyed these awesome funny love quotes. Please Don’t forget to share Funny Love Quotes | Humorous Love Quotations & Sayings to your Friends and family member. and you might want to check out our list of love quotes saying images as well.